Reading 2006: Episode IV
After my extra breakfast we went to Waitrose. I saw something that I had never seen before, but now I see them in every shop I visit. What the hell do you do with it?
There was no vodka to be had anywhere. We went back and I had my first piss of the weekend. Some poor bastard had shit a can of Strongbow.
We began the day by watching Taking Back Sunday, who aren't particularly good, but I do like one of their songs. When I say I like one of their songs, I mean they have a song that I like one line in. Keep your eye on this guy, he's got a star tattoo and looks like he's up to no good.
Someone call the police, he's pushing that man.
I went off to watch Dresden Dolls and Hope of the States while every else watched Less Than Jake. All weekend I had wanted one of these big yorkshire puddings. Can you imagine my disappointment when it was Smash not mash, and the pudding tasted like cardboard? Good sausage though.
Petty fate had dealt Evan's sunglasses a cruel blow, but it was nothing a bit of sellotape couldn't fix.
Goldie Lookin' Chain. Is there a place for Welsh novelty rap in today's society?
Before I came to Reading, Coca Cola had given me a £30,000 budget to make this journal. I had £29,850 left so I hired a tiny helicopter to fly around taking pictures of people for the rest of the day.
Our neighbours had a megaphone for the duration of the festival. It wasn't funny on the Thursday, then it went funny, then annoying and switched between annoying and funny over the five days. As you would expect.
A lovely bottle of piss, a poor man's bottle of tasty Diet Coke, available with cherry, lime and lemon.
I lost all feeling in my nose, mouth and throat.
Me again. Me, me, me. You can't get enough me.
Many people were standing on either side of this hedge. They were throwing things. The following people didn't like it:
1) The Police
2) The Stewards
The following people did like it:
1) Everyone else
After a long time standing around waiting for everyone to meet on the platform between the dance and Radio One tents, we made our way into the dance tent. The damage had already been done, I had to listen to the Kooks. I felt very sad in the dance tent, so I went with Ev and John to watch Peal Jam.
An hour passed and I was still feeling sad. Then, without warning, the stage doubled in size and I could see every single hair on the singerman's head in explicit detail. After signing a release, Evan took this photo of me.
I returned the favour.
Feel privileged loyal readers, because right here you are witnessing the happiest moment of my life. All I could be sure of was Pearl Jam were the best band I had ever seen, the song they were playing was the best song I'd ever heard, and John and Evan were the best people I had ever known.
Out of nowhere, I had an unstoppable desire to dance, so we went back to the dance tent.
We needed something to do. There was more chance of us stealing Belgium than there was of us getting into the Silent Disco, home of the most angry man of all time. We did the only thing we could, we went back to the tents. Evan played the most beautiful song you will ever hear: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUc-5d40Gpw
Then for no reason at all I had the second worst feeling I'd ever had, but it was still the best second worst feeling I'd ever had.
Morning came, as she always does.
There was no vodka to be had anywhere. We went back and I had my first piss of the weekend. Some poor bastard had shit a can of Strongbow.
We began the day by watching Taking Back Sunday, who aren't particularly good, but I do like one of their songs. When I say I like one of their songs, I mean they have a song that I like one line in. Keep your eye on this guy, he's got a star tattoo and looks like he's up to no good.
Someone call the police, he's pushing that man.
I went off to watch Dresden Dolls and Hope of the States while every else watched Less Than Jake. All weekend I had wanted one of these big yorkshire puddings. Can you imagine my disappointment when it was Smash not mash, and the pudding tasted like cardboard? Good sausage though.
Petty fate had dealt Evan's sunglasses a cruel blow, but it was nothing a bit of sellotape couldn't fix.
Goldie Lookin' Chain. Is there a place for Welsh novelty rap in today's society?
Before I came to Reading, Coca Cola had given me a £30,000 budget to make this journal. I had £29,850 left so I hired a tiny helicopter to fly around taking pictures of people for the rest of the day.
Our neighbours had a megaphone for the duration of the festival. It wasn't funny on the Thursday, then it went funny, then annoying and switched between annoying and funny over the five days. As you would expect.
A lovely bottle of piss, a poor man's bottle of tasty Diet Coke, available with cherry, lime and lemon.
I lost all feeling in my nose, mouth and throat.
Me again. Me, me, me. You can't get enough me.
Many people were standing on either side of this hedge. They were throwing things. The following people didn't like it:
1) The Police
2) The Stewards
The following people did like it:
1) Everyone else
After a long time standing around waiting for everyone to meet on the platform between the dance and Radio One tents, we made our way into the dance tent. The damage had already been done, I had to listen to the Kooks. I felt very sad in the dance tent, so I went with Ev and John to watch Peal Jam.
An hour passed and I was still feeling sad. Then, without warning, the stage doubled in size and I could see every single hair on the singerman's head in explicit detail. After signing a release, Evan took this photo of me.
I returned the favour.
Feel privileged loyal readers, because right here you are witnessing the happiest moment of my life. All I could be sure of was Pearl Jam were the best band I had ever seen, the song they were playing was the best song I'd ever heard, and John and Evan were the best people I had ever known.
Out of nowhere, I had an unstoppable desire to dance, so we went back to the dance tent.
We needed something to do. There was more chance of us stealing Belgium than there was of us getting into the Silent Disco, home of the most angry man of all time. We did the only thing we could, we went back to the tents. Evan played the most beautiful song you will ever hear: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUc-5d40Gpw
Then for no reason at all I had the second worst feeling I'd ever had, but it was still the best second worst feeling I'd ever had.
Morning came, as she always does.
posted by batteriesfeelincluded | 9:40 pm
1 Comments:
Woo Reading! Dresden Dolls were ace. Didn't need to see those 'toilets' again though.
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