Regina Spektor: Part Six

I had my first Yum Yum. It was too much for me too handle. It took six attempts to finish.


Onto the coach I go. Straight to the back. Yes, I have to put up with the smell of the toilet, but I get to have three seats to sleep on. Obviously some bastard came and sat by me and ruined everything.


Here's my ice cream. Mint Magnum or Magnum Mint. I was worried that the driver wouldn't let me on with it, but how can you say no to this face?


The tvs aren't working. Sigh.


To make the most of the London experience I bought Time Out, a magazine for people with a London fetish.


If you look closely, you can see God. Only Joking.


I have no idea where I am. The driver says we have 15 minutes. I wonder if he'd drive off if I came back late.


The man on the right is buying porn. Doesn't he know about the internet? He wrapped his magazine in a bag and spent a long time in the toilet back on the coach, but I didn't see him carry the magazine in with him. He must have had one hell of a wank bank and memorised the pictures.


I like Oasis a lot.


If they're going to charge £1.39 for a bottle of Coke they could at least put them in the fridge.


These toilets smelled bad.


I think someone needs to sit down with the board for the Loo Awards and have a serious chat. The toilets didn't even have paper towels to dry my face. I ended up using a toilet seat cover by mistake.


Phew, it's still here.


This is what I bought in HMV. God bless 1axe.


Argh! Lepper Corns.


After many, many hours I think I see something familiar. Can it be?


Just look at the anticipation in my face.


Yes! It's the infamous Swansea Marina Tesco.


What the shit? Where's the driver? Surely I haven't been driven home on a ghost coach? I've got chills.



I think we've all learned some valuable lessons after this journey.