A Friday Night

We started by going to Revolution, then to the Bank Statement, then to La Cantina. This is La Cantina, where everybody knows your name (unless you are me) and the tequila is a pound. I used to hate tequila, now I only dislike it. There's too much hate in the world without me making it worse.


I decided that we should arm wrestle. I was able to beat one girl and no boys. Not bad.


Then we went to Face Off, a club that used to be for young goths, but is now for cunty emos. It took a long time to get there due to general life-chaos and some people having to be sent home for being literally insane. I speak no lies, one guy really did lose control of his brain.


I went to the toilet and had a wee wee or a pee pee. Obviously I went into a cubicle, because I can't pee if someone is standing next to me and I'm not some sort of barbarian. It's not that I'm afraid that someone will try to look at my penis, it's just that I don't want anyone trying to cut it off. I was impressed to see that they have completely redone the toilets, making them one of the best instead of the very worst.


There were some bloody topless men in there dancing around. Bloody idiots. It is only acceptable to take your top off if you're on fire or have an allergy. I requested Whoyouknow by Mclusky via text message, but the dj was having none of it, so I asked for any Oasis and he was still having none of it. In summary, the world hates me.


Then we saw a friend's little sister. I suppose she's not actually little when compared to lamps and tables, but as far as I know I'm quite tall, so most people are little.


We left and went to Mcdonalds, home of the Mcdonalds staff when they aren't at home. I had two McChicken sandwiches, because I, Chin, wanted to eat two McChicken sandwiches.


The bouncer said we couldn't eat our food inside. I said I was waiting for mine and he said my friends would have to wait outside. Probably because of the possible threat of a terrorist attack. Bouncers in Mcdonalds, eh? No, he is not standing on the wall, it is simply a strange angle. Not even Mcdonalds bouncers have velcro shoes.


We ate our food in Chick-o-Land whilst someone else bought food. I've never known what the 'o' in Chick-o-Land is all about and I probably never will. Sigh.


I took a photo of my face to see if it was still there. It was! Call off the hounds!


We walked back to my flat and Rich hung upside down from some scaffolding.Nobody asked him to, but nobody complained either. With moves like that I'm surprised he's not an olympic swimming pool.


We got home and slept like kings. Kings of a land that may never exist in my lifetime. Finally, here is something for Ivan to moan about. Why? Because he hates looking at underwear, or something like that, but he likes looking at shoes and bison. I, on the other hand, like looking at underwear, but in a non-perverted way. Bison are ok, I suppose.


Fin.